Saturday, November 19, 2011

You made us a Family

Dear BBZ,

When we brought your brother home from the hospital, it became quite clear that his awake and fussy time was between 8pm and 10pm, right when you were going to bed.  Your daddy and I quickly had to adjust our routine to accommodate 2 boys with needs at the same time in 2 different places.  We tried bringing LBZ to your room, but he just kept you up.  So daddy started putting you to bed solo.

One night, when LBZ was just a few weeks old, I sat in the rocker and had just finished feeding him.  Your daddy came into the room and said that you told him that I wasn't part of your family anymore.  I knew what you meant and went into your room before you fell asleep to talk with you about it.

Before I got pregnant with LBZ, I put you to bed by myself.  Daddy gave you a kiss goodnight and that was it.  So when daddy started to be a part of your night time routine, you resisted him.  There were times you told him to go away and to leave your room.  During those times I told you that we were a family and we read together at night as a family.  I also said that when LBZ arrives, he would read with us too, as he would also be a part of our family.

So I knew exactly what you meant when you told your daddy I wasn't part of your family anymore.  I asked if this was right and you said yes.  The conversation went like this:

Me: A lot of things have changed since LBZ was born, haven't they?

You: Yes.

Me: He sure seems to get a lot of mommy's attention, doesn't he?

You: Yes.

Me: Do you want to know something that makes you so special?

You: Yes!

Me: Before you were born, your daddy and I were just 2 people.  We were just a couple, then you came along.  You made me a mommy.  You made daddy a daddy.  No one called us mommy or daddy until you came along.  LBZ is special too, but you had the most important job.  You made us a family.

You: I did?!?

Me: You did.  And you make me such a happy mommy.

And you do, my sweet boy.  You make me so happy to be your mommy.  Tonight we got to spend some time alone together when I took you to a birthday party and left daddy and LBZ at home.  Time alone with you, my first born, is so precious to me.  We snuggled in bed and I held you until you fell asleep...something I haven't been able to do as much lately.  I loved every minute of those snuggles!

So my sweet boy, this is how special you are to me.  We wouldn't be a family without you!