I hold the flower there ~ Doesn't know she's beautiful ~ She wakes every morning seeing ~ All the other things are beautiful ~ Well she's free ~ Companion to the wind ~ From "Gradle" By Widespread Panic
My blogging pal, Gina, commented on my last post asking for a photo of the bag I paid a little too much for, so it got me digging.
I went digging around the Internet to spread the word about this amazing artist/designer and I can't believe what I found out. Not only are all of her bags made from recycled and eco-friendly materials, but she also collects all of the decorative scraps from the very same local university where I did my graduate studies.
And not only that, but she is also legally blind.
I am continually amazed by the work this mother is doing and am spreading the love for her products not out of hopes of getting something back, but out of sheer respect for the way she has chosen to operate her business.
And I'm not one to put people with disabilities who have special talents up on a pedestal. The fact that she can create such beautiful work despite her disability is what fascinates me. I don't think she's some super-human or anything, just a very talented crafter who deserves recognitions for that. The fact that she is legally blind just makes her more interesting. If this doesn't make sense, just pick up the book "No Pity" by Joseph P. Shapiro, who explains it much better than I do.
So in my search I found a little TV spot showcasing her talents and included a picture of the bag that I no longer think I paid too much for. Like most handmade goodies, it's like wearable art and is worth every penny!
Oh, what a weekend!
Really, it was crazy packed full of fun and lots of playing!
BBZ is obsessed with firetrucks. Seriously. Obsessed. I love playing with him, but one can only play firetrucks for so long before dying to do something else. Knowing that we were going to an Easter egg hunt in the morning, I decided to get the Easter stuff out of the basement and do some practice hunting.
It was so fun! BBZ and N and I took turns hiding and finding the eggs. He was totally pumped and ready for the real deal, which was at the Botanical Garden Saturday morning.
The weather was terrible! It was cold and rainy and I bundled us up ready for a fun chilly day outdoors. Little did I know that when the weather is bad, they have the hunt indoors. it was still fun, but not nearly as fun as it would have been had we been able to run and enjoy the beautiful outdoor garden.
Here's BBZ as a top-notch egg hunter!
I wouldn't generally videotape something this uninteresting, but I took one photo with my camera and the batteries died. At least I had my cell phone! The pictures turned out terrible, but the video is pretty good!
So the rest of the weekend we argued with numerous requests for the delicious candy that was in those colored eggs. It was not so fun. He has a serious love of fruity candy. Just like his mama and his daddy!
Today was an awesome day. My mom is still in town helping my grandparents getting settled into their new place, which is an independent living arrangement at a senior housing complex. She and I drove out there this morning, which was the first time I saw the place. It's really nice, but they said they are having a tough time adjusting. It's not home, but it is a beautiful place. We're going to another Easter egg hunt on Saturday there.
Next my mom came along with me for a lunch I had planned with some friends from elementary school. Now these girls know me. Not the me that I think some people know, but the me that has been me since 3rd grade. And I know them too. It is such a joy to spend time with them and to know that through all these years, we still love each others' company.
While I was off with my mom this morning, N had a fun-filled day with Mr. BBZ. Their day started at the Zoo and ended at the Earth Day Festival in Forest Park. I am a little jealous! Not really though...I love that he and N spend time like this together.
My mom and I came home around 3:30 and N was desperately trying to get BBZ to nap. Something BBZ never did do. So he was worse then cranky this evening, but that's ok. He went out like a light at bedtime! (Hence why I actually have time to blog tonight!
I made a huge splurge purchase this weekend. At the garden on Saturday, there was a women there who sewed handmade, eco-friendly, gorgeous purses. As soon as I walked up I knew I was going to buy one. Little did I know that I was going to spend WAY too much on the most perfect messenger/diaper bag that I have been keeping my eyes wide open for.
I didn't use cloth diapers with BBZ until he was 6 months old. I hope to use cloth with this little fellow as soon as possible, so I needed a bag that would accommodate quite a few cloth beauties. I also knew that I really wanted a handmade one and had been eyeing a few on Etsy, but those were even more expensive than this one. It is so pretty and I can't wait to use it! And, since it's not a traditional diaper bag, I will be able to use it after this little man is done needing one!
So it was worth the arm and half a leg I paid for it. That's what I'm telling myself anyway :)
Just 2 days ago, we found out that you are, in fact, a little boy. I knew you were there, growing and sharing little flutters of life inside my body. But I don't think I appreciated how REAL you are until I saw you yawn on the ultrasound screen.
No longer were you an idea in my mind. You are alive. Your kicks have a purpose, one that I choose to believe is your way of telling me hello. You are growing and developing and will soon bless our house with so many newborn things that we have forgotten.
I went through your brother's (I love saying that!) newborn clothes and got many things out of the basement for you. We also got some wonderful hand-me-downs from friends who no longer needed their baby things. We are still months away from meeting you, but your presence here in our house is already making a noticeable difference.
As I sit here, quietly feeling your gentle movements, I am taken away to my daydreams of you and your brother playing in our backyard. To watching you crawl around our new home. To seeing you stumble as you learn to walk in the grass out back. To seeing BBZ teach you how to throw rocks into the pond. BBZ is going to make a wonderful big brother! Thank you for making his wish to become one come true.
So now we just wait. We wait for you to grow strong and to come into this world and complete our family. We love you so much, little man, and can't wait to have you here in our arms.
Although I am a little surprised as I swore at the beginning it was a girl, I am so unbelievable excited about being the mama to 2 little boys!
The appointment went really well and BBZ did pretty well during the visit. Where we were was a teaching school, so one of the women was a student. I didn't mind being a human subject for her at first, but as we approached the 2-hour mark and with BBZ running on empty, I was really ready to be done!
But seeing the little man on the screen was unbelievable. We looked at a lot of body parts before we saw the ones we were kind of looking for, and I didn't mind. At one point my mom took BBZ out to the hallway for a little walk and our littlest boy had our full attention. Then, plain as day, he yawned! It was a huge open mouthed baby yawn that we saw clear as could be. It was so awesome.
So my mind is already running around ideas such as bunk beds and camp outs in our backyard. With brotherly love and fights and getting into trouble. With being ok with buying a few expensive boy things knowing that this little guy can use them too. The reasons I thought this was a girl are quickly floating into the past as I imagine my littlest boy entering our lives. I am so happy.
Here are some photos of our sweet babe's first real photo shoot!
So the yawn below probably looks a little creepy, but it was an amazingly beautiful sight to see his little mouth open so wide and close just as quickly, the way new little yawners do.
2 or so weeks ago it was a girl with a ruby red eye brow piercing.
Last night, it was a boy. And it was the best dream I have had yet.
I don't remember much before being in labor, and it was a strange labor. I know it was unmedicated, but I was calm, cool and collected and not afraid at all. Perhaps that was the best part of the dream. I was laboring, and then suddenly the baby was just here. My mom was there, N wasn't which is the opposite of how the real thing will be, and I was a little confused and asked if my doctor had been there at all. It was almost as though I fell asleep during what would have been the most difficult part of labor. My mom assured me that my doctor had, in fact, been there and guessed that I just forgot that part of the labor.
So my mom handed him to me and he was this sweet little bundle wrapped up like a burrito.
I don't really remember much after that. I did end up back in the building where I did my graduate work, but the building was different. And for some reason there were bread loaves all over the place. It was that delicious bread from Macaroni Grill that you tear off and dip in oil and spices. And I picked up one of the loaves and decided to keep it. Typing that just made me hungry :)
Dreams are weird.
My mom came in town yesterday and I am so happy she is here again! She brought with her the dress and bonnet that my dad bought for me from Saks 5th Ave that I wore home from the hospital a few days after I was born. If this baby is a girl, I hope is to have her wear the same dress and bonnet when we bring her home. And it will be from the same hospital. And if this baby is 5 days late, it will be within days I when I came home, 32 years earlier. That's pretty cool.
I love this kind of thing. I wanted terribly to wear my mother's wedding dress when I got married, but it was too small. I'm a petite girl, but my mom weight like 96 pounds when she got married, so that wasn't happening. I did wear the same necklace she did and walked down the aisle to the same song, it was this one:
Do you watch American Idol? I tried to forgo it this season and didn't watch any episodes until the top 24. I recorded it and thought I would give it a chance and it is the best season yet! I cannot believe how talented these young people are. I think I like them so much because many of them are musicians, not just pretty people who have nice voices. I heart Casey Abrams :)
As off-topic as that may sound, I do have a point. David Cook from a few years ago did his rendition on that show. And I loved it. Many people didn't, but that song has a special place in my heart. Here it is, if you feel inclined to listen.
In 48 hours, I will know if this baby is healthy, and if it is a boy or a girl!
It's hard to believe that this day is here. Peeing on the pink stick feels like it was just days ago, but thinking about how sick I felt makes me happy that it went by so quickly.
I feel much better about this being a healthy baby. I'm no longer worried that something might be wrong and am just excited to get a little peek at our sweet second baby.
My dreams have been all over the place! Last week I dreamt that it is twins, one boy and one girl. I really don't think it is twins, but perhaps this was my mind's way of explaining why I can't tell which it is!
My gut still says girl, and twice this week I dreamt it is a girl. But then yesterday I slipped and called the baby he twice! I called BBZ "he" all the time before we found out. Either way, I am so ready to stop calling this baby "it" and to start really thinking about names. N and I both prefer to wait until we know boy vs. girl to talk too much about names since it pretty much takes half of them off the table.
So Friday is the big day! BBZ, N and my mom will all be there and I just can't wait! And we're all taking the day off work to play and celebrate together. I can't think of a better way to celebrate our new growing family.